Antwerp 1920

The Belgian Olympic Committee published a 109 page tome on why the 1920 Olympics should be held in Antwerp. Berlin was already selected for 1916, so 1920 was the goal. I didn’t read the document, but I’m sure the arguments in favor included something along the lines of “dude, you already did St. Louis for crying out loud…” This document was circulated in Paris June 13, 1914. Due consideration was given to Antwerp, with a decision to be made shortly…

A few weeks later all hell broke loose. The Germans invaded and tore a hole through the country. 5 years of occupation ground away at the citizens.  Their fields were warped waves of mud, libraries in ashes, industry crippled, and 2% of their population simply gone. After the final armistice late in 2018, the International Olympic Committee asked Antwerp: after hosting a few million unwanted belligerents for 5 years, would you still like to host the Olympics in 18 months’ time? The response: You Bet!

The 1920 Olympics didn’t hold the gravitas of other games: no Jesse Owens, Nadia Comaneci, or miracle on ice… But they did have Korfball. (Really, I didn’t make that name up.) Also of note, ice hockey made its debut (Canada crushed everyone, so some things don’t change). Tug of war made for a fun side-show I’m sure. Also, to my surprise, the sport with the 2^nd greatest # of events? Shooting. 21 different shooting events. You’d think they would tone down the shooting…

The home team was a game 4^th place in the medal count. The Belgians crushed it in archery, winning 8 of 10 gold medals (how did they miss out on Team Moving Bird – 28 meters after already winning Team Moving Bird – 33 meters???) But they saved the best for soccer. A dominating Czech squad had rolled into the finals, winning their first 3 games by a combined score of 15-1. Belgium was undeterred and posted 2 goals in the first half. It turns out that was all they needed since the Czech team quit before halftime, and the Belgian fans stormed the field to celebrate. You think 1980’s American college kids invented storming the court? Think again:

In 1920, with essentially no time to catch their breath, the Belgians invited the world back. And they threw a party.

 No party is complete without some top-end gymnastics.

 

Look at these knuckleheads goofing for the camera. Yeah, I’m talking to you, third-from-right... and second from left... and dead center.

 

In 2016, Rio threw a party too. Poop in the open water, green mystery in the pool water, zika in the bugs, strife in the favelas, corruption in the IOC, drugs in the Russians, alcohol in the Lochte, and on and on. The problems of Rio are real and well-documented. As were the problems of Belgium. But above these facts lay the simple genius of that circus huckster Pierre de Coubertin: sometimes games are just fun.

 

String Theory

Physicists think we might have about 12 dimensions: 3 regular ones that unfurled completely, a bunch that stayed curled up in infinitesimal balls, and then there's time. While the regular dimensions can go either way, time doesn't, and no one knows why. Time has an arrow.

Archers at the Olympics are a weird breed. This is a sport that requires concentration and relaxation at the same time. These zen masters spend their days in ever-shrinking concentric circles. The live inside their heads, with a sport that despite all the gadgets reduces to nothing other than consecutive 20 foot putts to win the Masters.

The men's team archery finals were fun to watch. First there was the French team with their matching "Party of Five" length stubble beards. They were fun and loose, but also out quickly. Then the Chinese with the Nike-branded bucket hats. But they were dispatched by the Americans. The Americans were anchored by Brady Ellison. While his Wikipedia entry says he's from Arizona and is called "The Prospector" we all know his nickname is really Bear when he's pounding a case of Old Milwaukee with his boys in Wisconsin. They were the class of the field - until the South Koreans, that is.

Bear on the hunt

Like cycling's yellow jersey, I suppose, being #1 in the world means Kim wears the white half-bra instead of black

Korea led off with Kim Woo-Jin, the world-record holder in the event, who is so cool, he wears  prescription glasses and some sort of evil genius patch on this cheek where the string rests at full draw. Thousands of arrows day after day comes down to a handful in Brazil, with a setting sun, and some stray thundersticks in the crowd. In the first set of the gold medal round, Korea unleashed 6 straight bulls-eyes for a perfect score of 60. It was over after that. Americans never found the confidence to come back.

A deviation of even a half of an arc-second (1/3600 degrees) left, right, up, down, or draw strength means a terrible miss. Once you release, the arrow cannot be called back. It only goes one way. Whether one believes in free will or a clockwork predestination since the universe was a billionth of a second old, in this sport, the score is already determined before the arrow covers 70 meters and buries itself in the target. Korea had already won - we were just waiting for the formality.

Russia gives 203%

Imagine you are a bird. Your nest is a little ragged and a little low on the tree, but it is your nest. The Joneses have a nicer one down the way. Maybe you should go over, peck the crap out of them and take the place. Or maybe not. You could get hurt or dead, and would lose what you have here. On the other hand, if a rival bird came over to take your nest, you would defend it to your last breath. It isn't a great nest, but it is your nest. And it will be defended.

Evolution has encoded this strategy into physical characteristics measurable in nature. Humans have it too, by way of increased testosterone primarily. Putting aside life and death, we see it it in the way we play. Home teams win 54% of MLB baseball games. NHL 56%. NFL 58%. NBA 61%.

In the Olympics, the past 5 winter Olympic home teams have scored 144% Poolmaster pools in the year they host the Olympics relative to away years. Here are the data:

Over that time, Russia averaged 63. So coming into Sochi, Russia should have had 91 points to keep the typical home advantage. They had 129, more than double their average winter performance.

The Russian athletes came into Sochi almost on the uphill: crazy high expectations and a crazy leader who wrestles bears and bends frying pans while watching over you with those steely dead eyes.

Cross country skier Alexander Legkov raced 1 time early in the games and then was benched apparently for internal political reasons. How did he respond when his name was finally called for the 4x10k relay? He skied the fastest split of anyone in the field by 25 seconds! In a 20 minute race, that's like winning the Boston Marathon by 2 1/2 minutes, or winning the Indy 500 by lapping the whole field 4 times. As an encore he cranked up the final hill in the premier event, the 50k to lead Russia in a sweep of the podium. Legkov after the race: "It's more valuable than my life, I can't express how I feel. For 15 years I've been trying for this result."

They have a crazy leader, a cold challenging climate, and tap water that apparently can burn your face off. But it is home, and it will be defended.

Some called this Putin's Olympics, but it wasn't. It was Alexander's, and Viktor's, and Adenlina's, and all of the 13 gold medal winners for Russia. Their home performance should be a reminder to Putin that our evolution was not the one of the apes in 2001 A Space Odyssey, rather one of the birds. Societies thrive when they are physically predisposed to coexist.

Imagine you are a bird. You defend home ferociously so that you don't have to.

Not your grandfather's Olympics

Freestyle skiing and snowboarding events have been around since Nagano, so only the most curmudgeonly old-timer would shake their head at events with tricks called the McTwist or the YOLO or the fakey. Slopestyle is new, but it's not new, you know? I'm fine with new events. I'd watch speed skate team laser tag if they put it together. The Poolmaster (besides referring to himself in the third person nickname style) is not interested in the half-baked nostalgia that forgets the downside to hockey without helmets or opening ceremonies without LED. Forward progress!

However, Sochi has issues. Oh yes. Not talking about the baby journalists who can't take a joke with the falling doorknobs and no-flush toilet paper. The issue is that it is not a winter town. It is not cold. Today, of the 22 cities that have hosted the SUMMER Olympics, Sochi was warmer than 15 of them. Sochi at night was warmer than mid-afternoon Atlanta. Don't believe me? Here's the chart:




What do the fine locals of Sochi do for fun? Relax under their palm trees, play a little tennis, and get in some sailing. No ski jumping. No curling. Ever.

The men's normal hill ski jump was earlier this week. Here's a shot of the crowd:

Now, here's a photo of the same event in Oslo 1952:

Look at that. Imagine the people in the far upper left of the photo: Mr. and Mrs. Otto Oslo. It's a cold day in their hometown. They put on their best black coat and some sensible shoes and went to stand for hours to watch tiny specks launch themselves into the air. They couldn't even see them land, relying instead on the crowd noise to tell them if it was a good landing, a bad one, or a reallly bad one.

For Mr. and Mrs. Oslo, this was a world event, but a local one too. The atmosphere was certainly great because the excitement of the tourists was surpassed only by the locals who are just bananas for their event and are glad you came. How many of those exist anymore? Boston Marathon, Kentucky Derby, and that bizarro tomato fight day in some Spanish town. That's about it. We'll mourn the loss of those days, dulling the pain with great camera angles in HD and twitter updates about pinkeye (these Bob Costas jokes are getting cornea and cornea). And we'll embrace the fact that a Slovenian pop star can tie for gold in women's downhill with an old-school racer from a skiing family in a town of 4000 in the Swiss Alps. A place with no palm trees and where they don't go sailing. Ever.

Quick Update

Just a quick update: Halfpoint has taken a commanding lead in the pool, with angeli &-fecht and ukari figgs as the only 2 that have a reasonable chance of catching him. Unless of coure Anerbaijan pulls out 5 golds or so in the next 3 days. Who thought Iran would be the difference maker in these games? A&F and Ukari will be pulling for a decent USA haul in the closing few days to make up the ground. Last Minute Derek is holding strong in last. I don't think Brokeback Alex has what it takes to catch him.

Good Luck!

rank	name	score		A	B	C	D	E		event
1	halfpoint	381.1		Great Britain	Japan	Netherlands	Kenya	Iran		M 3000 steeplechase
2	angeli &-fecht	357.1		USA	Japan	Netherlands	Jamaica	Azerbaijan		M 100 meter dash
3	brandon "no nickname" mckenzie	357.1		Great Britain	Japan	Netherlands	Kenya	Azerbaijan		M 3000 steeplechase
4	ukari figgs	353.6		USA	South Korea	Netherlands	Jamaica	Mexico		M swimming 200 IM
5	lisa mcdrought	345.1		Great Britain	South Korea	Netherlands	Brazil	Azerbaijan		M archery team
6	sissy sara	342.1		Great Britain	Japan	Netherlands	Kenya	Azerbaijan		M marathon
7	jo nathan	342.1		Great Britain	Japan	Netherlands	Kenya	Azerbaijan		W field hockey
8	dig narddog	338.1		Great Britain	Japan	Ukraine	Jamaica	Azerbaijan		W badminton singles
9	bijou	325.6		USA	France	Netherlands	Brazil	Georgia		M 100 meter butterfly swim
10	Dan Hebel	321.1		USA	South Korea	Ukraine	Jamaica	Georgia		M basketball
11	speed skaty katy	314.1		USA	South Korea	Ukraine	Kenya	North Korea		M basketball
12	poolmaster	313.1		USA	South Korea	Ukraine	Kenya	Mongolia		M 3000 steeplechase
13	team luepke	312.1		USA	Japan	Canada	Kenya	Azerbaijan		M marathon
14	Daniel Steele	310.6		China	South Korea	Ukraine	Jamaica	North Korea		W 57 kg Judo
15	dad	298.1		China	Japan	Canada	Switzerland	South Africa		M table tennis singles
16	2 dog might	298.1		USA	France	Canada	Kenya	Argentina		M marathon
17	Gharry	296.6		China	Japan	Ukraine	Jamaica	Georgia		W 48 kg Judo
18	full monte	294.1		USA	France	Ukraine	Kenya	Azerbaijan		M marathon
19	flippy flyer	293.6		USA	Italy	Canada	Kenya	Azerbaijan		M swimming 200 IM
20	emily	278.1		Germany	Italy	Romania	Jamaica	North Korea		M 100 meter dash
21	sneaky peakey	258.1		Germany	South Korea	Spain	Brazil	Argentina		M canoe whitewater K1
22	will i am	255.6		China	Italy	Spain	Denmark	Uzbekistan		M soccer
23	brokeback alex	240.1		Australia	South Korea	Ukraine	Kenya	Azerbaijan		M 3000 steeplechase
24	last minute derek	223.1		Australia	Japan	Poland	New Zealand	Slovenia		W gymnastics team