Quick Update

Just a quick update: Halfpoint has taken a commanding lead in the pool, with angeli &-fecht and ukari figgs as the only 2 that have a reasonable chance of catching him. Unless of coure Anerbaijan pulls out 5 golds or so in the next 3 days. Who thought Iran would be the difference maker in these games? A&F and Ukari will be pulling for a decent USA haul in the closing few days to make up the ground. Last Minute Derek is holding strong in last. I don't think Brokeback Alex has what it takes to catch him.

Good Luck!

rank	name	score		A	B	C	D	E		event
1	halfpoint	381.1		Great Britain	Japan	Netherlands	Kenya	Iran		M 3000 steeplechase
2	angeli &-fecht	357.1		USA	Japan	Netherlands	Jamaica	Azerbaijan		M 100 meter dash
3	brandon "no nickname" mckenzie	357.1		Great Britain	Japan	Netherlands	Kenya	Azerbaijan		M 3000 steeplechase
4	ukari figgs	353.6		USA	South Korea	Netherlands	Jamaica	Mexico		M swimming 200 IM
5	lisa mcdrought	345.1		Great Britain	South Korea	Netherlands	Brazil	Azerbaijan		M archery team
6	sissy sara	342.1		Great Britain	Japan	Netherlands	Kenya	Azerbaijan		M marathon
7	jo nathan	342.1		Great Britain	Japan	Netherlands	Kenya	Azerbaijan		W field hockey
8	dig narddog	338.1		Great Britain	Japan	Ukraine	Jamaica	Azerbaijan		W badminton singles
9	bijou	325.6		USA	France	Netherlands	Brazil	Georgia		M 100 meter butterfly swim
10	Dan Hebel	321.1		USA	South Korea	Ukraine	Jamaica	Georgia		M basketball
11	speed skaty katy	314.1		USA	South Korea	Ukraine	Kenya	North Korea		M basketball
12	poolmaster	313.1		USA	South Korea	Ukraine	Kenya	Mongolia		M 3000 steeplechase
13	team luepke	312.1		USA	Japan	Canada	Kenya	Azerbaijan		M marathon
14	Daniel Steele	310.6		China	South Korea	Ukraine	Jamaica	North Korea		W 57 kg Judo
15	dad	298.1		China	Japan	Canada	Switzerland	South Africa		M table tennis singles
16	2 dog might	298.1		USA	France	Canada	Kenya	Argentina		M marathon
17	Gharry	296.6		China	Japan	Ukraine	Jamaica	Georgia		W 48 kg Judo
18	full monte	294.1		USA	France	Ukraine	Kenya	Azerbaijan		M marathon
19	flippy flyer	293.6		USA	Italy	Canada	Kenya	Azerbaijan		M swimming 200 IM
20	emily	278.1		Germany	Italy	Romania	Jamaica	North Korea		M 100 meter dash
21	sneaky peakey	258.1		Germany	South Korea	Spain	Brazil	Argentina		M canoe whitewater K1
22	will i am	255.6		China	Italy	Spain	Denmark	Uzbekistan		M soccer
23	brokeback alex	240.1		Australia	South Korea	Ukraine	Kenya	Azerbaijan		M 3000 steeplechase
24	last minute derek	223.1		Australia	Japan	Poland	New Zealand	Slovenia		W gymnastics team

Super Happy Caption Time

"I want to eat you!" - "I'm totally winning dodgeball gold this year" - "ok, cosine of 42 degrees with backspin and 2 pi yaw..." - "you had me at 'boing'" - "wake me when your serve is decent" - "go to your home, ball" - "we welcome our new cyborg pong overlords" - "this isn't going to end well" - "i am the first fish to qualify"

"So which organ can I eat as my reward???"

"These captions just blew my mind!"

Bad Badminton

Stop me if you've heard this one before, but "Controversy Rocks the Olympic Games!" But this isn't your run of the mill roided-out 100m sprinter or 12 year old gymnastic with a fake birth certificate. We're talking 4 teams of badminton doubles (half of the remaining field) getting booted for trying to lose their last game of the round robin first round. Apparently, these teams all had qualified for the next round before their last match, and winning their final round robin match would mean they'd have to face a tough Chinese team in the knockout stage. So we were left with a bunch of elite players acting as if they are in the loser's bracket of the Camp Arcadia Olympics instead of ... well ... the real Olympics. The stodgy officials weren't happy and kicked them all out.

So what are we to make of this? Fans paid good scalped ticket $ to watch crap badminton (Col. Nathan Jessup if you please: "Is there any other kind?") However, the goal is to win gold, not game 3. During road cycling, you often see the eventual winners tucked into the peloton for more than half of the race, conserving energy and waiting to press hard when it matters. No one has any problem with that. How is this any different?

These 8 athletes were caught in the crease between 2 things the Olympic viewer wants: for athletes to try their hardest to win and for athletes to always appear to try their hardest to win. Usually, these go hand in hand (Kerri Strug even went so far as to fake an injury to meet these 2 requirements). But here, to win at all costs, the best plan was to lose. Ladies who play bad badminton, I for one salute you!

It feels wrong to have a  post on controversy doesn't include this photo of the Japanese gymnastics coach approaching the judges with a fistful of hundies:

"So I was told to hand this to a French lady with a ridiculous fur coat."

In other news, we are through 5 days in the competition now. North Korea is owning group E while both China and US are good picks in group A. Our leaderboard starts with Daniel Steele, Speed Skaty Katy, and Emily. But Daniel has already lost his gold guarantee. These 3 also have room to improve because they expect big points from their group D countries in track and field, which begins this weekend. Last Minute Derek is riding Australia all the way to the bottom, but with plenty of competition from those who took the host country. Still very early. Enjoy!

Ceremonial Opening

What a way to kick off the Olympics! It was very nice of Danny Boyle to arrange a refresher course in European History 101 since it's been a while for me. For example, I totally forgot that England was a bunch of maypole pagan sissies until Kenneth Branagh came along with his band of breakdancing industry titans, forced everyone to smelt iron ore and then invented the Olympics. I had mistakenly thought they are still maypole pagan sissies. I stand corrected. Aside from accidental Occidental learning, there was plenty more to feast your eyes on:

How nice of the Queen to make a surprise appearance! I don't care what people say, she looks stunning in black...

The obligatory Tron scene

I had no idea Betty White was British - how nice of them to pair her with James Bond.

Oh, and if you had tae kwon do in the side-pool for most flagbearers, you won going away. Congrats!

Lastly, the ceremonies made some time for Herbalife spokesman David Beckham. Coincidentally, Beckham has played in just as many Olympics as the Queen and poolmaster combined!

But alack, all good fodder for jokes must come to an end. Let's play.